Friday, 28 October 2011

Friday Golf

Been a busy few days, with a trip down to the ‘big town’ Brisvegas to pick up the Prado, Friday piss-heads Golf and news the visa for Chad has been issued.

Heavy morning on the ‘net sorting out flights back to the UK – onward flights arranged weeks ago.  All sorted now, just hotels to arrange and I’ll be off the Heart of Africa to find out if it lives up to all my prejudices!  Guess I’ll have to start studying the brief now to find out what the Client wants!!!

At least I’ll have time for another Fridays’ Golf.  Miles from nowhere, we have this great little 9 hole course, with irrigation and water features and a smashing little Clubhouse.  Often during the week, you can play a round and see nobody, hear nothing except the occasional, distant rumble of the RoadTrains.  But Fridays there’s a gathering of the semi-retired, retired and bone-idle around 2:30.  A few stiffeners to start, buy a chilled 6-pack each at a special rate, into the coollers with the free ice and off we go.  Enough buggies to ride around on (well, you don’t want to walk in this heat) and 18 holes to play (9 every week –  we don’t want to wear ourselves out.  The 4th tee is by the Clubhouse, so if you’ve been particularly thirsty you can get another top-up.

No dress code, no silly rules and none of the stuffy bollocks you find in the UK (mentioning no names Blackdown, Rugby et al).  Just a bunch of gentle drunks playing a fun game for a few dollars.  Most of these old buggers have single figure handicaps with me still on 34.  The buggers won’t let me play for money as the scoring means I’d clean up (don’t ask me how, no idea.  Stableford is a mystery to me)  

Of course, most go home pissed in this nation of virulent anti-drink driving.  The local bobby was reputed to have told his Chief when tasked with dealing with them “You fuck off – I have to live with them.  My back-up is 70kms east, 150kms west, nowt north and fuck-all south.  They haven’t as much as run a cat over in the 10 years I’ve been here.  So bollocks.  Sir”

And so the odd Golf buggy can be seen wending its gentle way home as the stars appear.

And talking of bollocks, I notice that deluded pillock Bliar claimed today that unfettered immigration has had "a positive effect of the UK"
He's right there - it's positively fucked the place!

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